Are you a Redneck Calvinist?

Refreshing humor from the Calvinist Gadfly.

You might be a Redneck Calvinist if…

the church you attend is not seeker-friendly, but cigar-friendly.

you hear “Free Will,” and think about bailing out your cousin “Will” in jail.

your dad uses the double barrel shotgun for his own “effectual calling.”

you think that an Amyrauldian is road kill.

BHT means Barbeque Hogs Tonight.

the only overalls you will buy are made by Calvin.

you compliment your wife with, “God has ordained your voice to sound like a chainsaw.”

your church has justified to include the banjo and harmonica under the Regulative Principle.

your church refuses to call the church picnic a Potluck.

you have the five solas tattooed on your arm.

No, that's not my arm.